Fifty Dollar Frappuccino
Apr. 19th, 2012 02:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
keiramarcosThere is a rule in the cafe agreed upon by all the regulars that if you're caught with a Starbucks coffee (no matter where you are) you have to buy coffee for everyone the next time you go into the cafe. There are ten of us. The thing is that I can't complain about this rule because I MADE IT. That's right.
Today, I was at the grocery store getting some stuff and they have a Starbucks right in the store. Really. Right in the store and I rarely turn down an opportunity to buy those chocolate covered graham crackers from Starbucks. They're like crack. Well, I'm in line to get me some of those crackers and the son of a bitch in front of me ordered a frappuccino and it looked soo good and it was so hot outside and my foot kind of hurt so I thought I deserved a treat sort of... so of course by the time I get up to the cashier to pay for my crackers the following comes out of my mouth. "I'll take these crackers and a venti cafe vanilla frap, sugar free, no whip." (Total: $8.26) It just happened. I ordered it against my will. I get one of those little nifty cup holder things to clip onto my cart and I go about my business with my crackers and my frosty coffee thing and for once it was decent. A lot of times the coffee is scorched which is nasty.
You know where this is going, right? I'm in the cereal aisle (What? Cock Provider loves him some Cinnamon Chex) and I hear this click, not unlike the sound of a CAMERA. There is SciFi Writer at the end of the aisle with his fucking iPhone, the horrid hipster that he is, and a minute later I get a picture of myself with a Starbucks cup that has been sent to our entire writing "clique" with the caption: Cafe 1pm. She's buying.
Coffee for 10 people: $42.15
Being Owned by Snotty Rule YOU Inflicted on Your Friends: Painful
Today, I was at the grocery store getting some stuff and they have a Starbucks right in the store. Really. Right in the store and I rarely turn down an opportunity to buy those chocolate covered graham crackers from Starbucks. They're like crack. Well, I'm in line to get me some of those crackers and the son of a bitch in front of me ordered a frappuccino and it looked soo good and it was so hot outside and my foot kind of hurt so I thought I deserved a treat sort of... so of course by the time I get up to the cashier to pay for my crackers the following comes out of my mouth. "I'll take these crackers and a venti cafe vanilla frap, sugar free, no whip." (Total: $8.26) It just happened. I ordered it against my will. I get one of those little nifty cup holder things to clip onto my cart and I go about my business with my crackers and my frosty coffee thing and for once it was decent. A lot of times the coffee is scorched which is nasty.
You know where this is going, right? I'm in the cereal aisle (What? Cock Provider loves him some Cinnamon Chex) and I hear this click, not unlike the sound of a CAMERA. There is SciFi Writer at the end of the aisle with his fucking iPhone, the horrid hipster that he is, and a minute later I get a picture of myself with a Starbucks cup that has been sent to our entire writing "clique" with the caption: Cafe 1pm. She's buying.
Coffee for 10 people: $42.15
Being Owned by Snotty Rule YOU Inflicted on Your Friends: Painful
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:14 pm (UTC)oooh...better yet, we should get some made up with one of the minion Icons printed on them!
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 08:20 pm (UTC)It is a sad day.
Date: 2012-04-25 07:04 am (UTC)Do not hide your coffee choice. Embrace it! Be proud of it, and walk with your head held high!
Just because you choose to frequent an establishment mocked and looked down on by your friends, family, peer, minions and sycophants alike is no reason to embrace shame and ignominy!
There is nothing wrong with a cup of coffee from Starbucks. It shows you as the trendy hipster that you want people to think you are, one who never follows trends and the crowd, but boldly forges into the social unknown and makes their own trends!
Don't let the fact that I think I could menstruate a better cup put you off! Or the fact that I don't think anything they sell is technically coffee, except in the broadest, legal definition. We all have are unique likes and dislikes, or wants, needs, kinks, fetishes, oddities and unfathomable behaviors that others look down on.
Do not let this stop you from spending your hard earned money for something that is both overpriced and fictional. (really? Venti? Because we all need an excuse to practice our conversational Italian in case we need to count to twenty.)
If you hesitate, pause or possibly even reflect on the error of your ways consider this the following:
Ten people got a free, good cup of coffee for your sacrifice.
Things like this make me proud to be human.
Just saying,
MPK
Re: It is a sad day.
Date: 2012-04-25 03:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:31 pm (UTC)If the next time I go to Starbucks and ask for the "$50 Mocha Frap, please" and get a crazy look... well I'll just say I'm a minion and leave it at that.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:34 pm (UTC)or the Slut avvie on a travel mug
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 07:36 pm (UTC)On another note, though, I'm thrilled to see that you're out and about - broken foot (ouch!) notwithstanding.
*hugs*
snerk
Date: 2012-04-19 07:59 pm (UTC)Loved the video! I don't watch the show, though, so why was he telling her to get off the stage?
I gotta tell you, as a well endowed woman myself, it can hurt to shake your boobs that hard. She sure kept the beat though!
Re: snerk
Date: 2012-04-19 08:03 pm (UTC)But s/he's really pretty as a girl and dang s/he has fiiine legs
Re: snerk
Date: 2012-04-19 08:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 08:01 pm (UTC):: clears throat :: I am going to second the suggestion of a insulated cup... It would be the cheaper option.
Right. Uhm.... Oh, hell. :: Giggle ::
~L
But were the crackers worth it?
Date: 2012-04-19 08:06 pm (UTC)Starbucks
Date: 2012-04-19 09:33 pm (UTC)Actually since they've started to put an extra shot in their drinks, I'm visiting a bit more!
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 10:56 pm (UTC)"This tastes bad. I want one of yours, mom."
The nice counter people tried very hard not to grimace. What can I say? She's cute!
no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 10:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 12:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 11:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-19 11:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 01:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 03:28 am (UTC)*dashes off to read*
no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 03:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 03:38 am (UTC)Technology and I have a love/hate relationship.
I'm doing the impatient Luddite bounce and squirm...
no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 04:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 02:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 02:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 06:02 am (UTC)>
>
>
>
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rotflmfao!!!
*ducks flying coffee cups*
no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 07:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 10:02 am (UTC)I'm sorry to say but you have only yourself to blame - and the Evil of Starbucks. But as you made the rule...
Maybe you should try undercover clothes/make-up the next time you are tempted... or have a magnet in your pocket. Too bad for your own phone. :D
no subject
Date: 2012-04-20 12:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-21 10:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-22 02:37 am (UTC)