Don't Make Me Hate You
Oct. 24th, 2011 10:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
keiramarcosSo,
Today, a small coincidence happened in my gmail in box. Two different people sent me their work and asked if I had time to give feedback. Well, frankly between NaNoWriMo, the flu, my husband's current staycation, my mother's current addiction to pedicures, and a new professional deadline -- I'm swamped -- I don't even have time to plan minor armed conflict right now.
I told both people that I didn't have the time to devote to a new beta relationship and that's the most serious, total truth. One person was very gracious about it and the other not so much. Now, really, I don't want to be a bigger asshole about this than normal but I do have the never-ending flu and I have PMS. I'm entirely positive that this response to my polite refusal was completely out of goddamned line :: "You're so fucking selfish"
This is not to say that I'm not kind of self-involved because I am. In fact, I know precious few people who aren't a little self-involved. I do have a twitter account after all and if that isn't a sign of self-involvement I don't know what is.
Is it selfish that I don't have more time to give to other writers? The fact is that I do give a lot of time to other writers -- I mentor TWO writers in my area one in college and one who recently retired is getting into fiction writing for the first time ever. I give free workshops, I do seminars at the local university. Hosting a site for Nano is going to eat up a lot of my free time next month but I think it's important to get out and encourage other writers to take risks. I give back to my goddamned community all the time on the writer front. I chose to do this project within Fandom instead of doing it as a professional writer in an effort to give back to the fandom and to other fan fiction writers and also I thought that it would be entertaining for readers to see novels come together at such a fast pace in the NaNoWriMo environment challenge.
Sigh.
Today, a small coincidence happened in my gmail in box. Two different people sent me their work and asked if I had time to give feedback. Well, frankly between NaNoWriMo, the flu, my husband's current staycation, my mother's current addiction to pedicures, and a new professional deadline -- I'm swamped -- I don't even have time to plan minor armed conflict right now.
I told both people that I didn't have the time to devote to a new beta relationship and that's the most serious, total truth. One person was very gracious about it and the other not so much. Now, really, I don't want to be a bigger asshole about this than normal but I do have the never-ending flu and I have PMS. I'm entirely positive that this response to my polite refusal was completely out of goddamned line :: "You're so fucking selfish"
This is not to say that I'm not kind of self-involved because I am. In fact, I know precious few people who aren't a little self-involved. I do have a twitter account after all and if that isn't a sign of self-involvement I don't know what is.
Is it selfish that I don't have more time to give to other writers? The fact is that I do give a lot of time to other writers -- I mentor TWO writers in my area one in college and one who recently retired is getting into fiction writing for the first time ever. I give free workshops, I do seminars at the local university. Hosting a site for Nano is going to eat up a lot of my free time next month but I think it's important to get out and encourage other writers to take risks. I give back to my goddamned community all the time on the writer front. I chose to do this project within Fandom instead of doing it as a professional writer in an effort to give back to the fandom and to other fan fiction writers and also I thought that it would be entertaining for readers to see novels come together at such a fast pace in the NaNoWriMo environment challenge.
Sigh.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 03:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 03:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 03:59 am (UTC)Fuck 'em
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:00 am (UTC)Geez.
Bah. I also wouldn't touch them with Hugh's blown up dick.
~L
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 04:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 11:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:00 pm (UTC)A follow up
Date: 2011-10-26 03:32 pm (UTC)http://thebloggess.com/heres-a-picture-of-wil-wheaton-collating-papers/
You might think of doing the same. And it leads to endless fun, like what happened last month when she got some failure at launch request and emailed them Wil and then the PR VP called her a bitch and she tweeted it, and then they got their asses handed to them.
http://thebloggess.com/2011/10/and-then-the-pr-guy-called-me-a-fucking-bitch-i-cant-even-make-this-shit-up/
I had some ideas on what your response could entail, and then I realized that my mind is just not as devious or outspoken as yours and will leave it up to you.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 04:36 am (UTC)However, if you'd like to outsource your minor police action (so long as it's not a land war in Asia), I'd be happy to help. For a modest fee.
And seriously? you're still sick? are you feeling any better? I hope you get better soon, love.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 06:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 08:23 am (UTC)Yeah, that is always fun.
Hope yours goes away soon!!!
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 06:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 08:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 10:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:17 am (UTC)behave his/her/its hamburger cut in half? If you were fit as a fiddle, feeling fine, walking on top of the world and had nothing to do but sit on a pillow and sew a fine seam (did I miss any Old Southern expressions life in tall cotton there?) it would still not warrant that response. What you do with your unstructured time is your business and no one else's.As if you needed it, you absolutely have my authorization to blow off Entitlement Princesses (or Prince, as the case may be; shouldn't want to discriminate.)
Also?
Date: 2011-10-25 05:21 am (UTC)OMG Hugh's dick and whole hamburgers are too good for this jackass.
Re: Also?
Date: 2011-10-25 06:23 am (UTC)~L
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 05:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 08:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 11:52 am (UTC)But, yeah, they are so very very out of line.
Feel better, leader of the cult.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 12:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 12:18 pm (UTC)Aw, such cute boys.
You give tons and tons to fandom, and writers. Hell, you're talking to students and all kinds of stuff...so yeah, I'm not feeling their pain so much.
PMS sucks. But pedicures are seriously addictive.
Um, zinc and vitamin C? Chest colds *really* suck.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 12:23 pm (UTC)Feel better, Fearless Leader, and watch that cough. My brother's girlfriend managed to crack two ribs from coughing too hard.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 01:02 pm (UTC)As far as the idiot who called you selfish, I truly have no words. *so very baffled by entitlement*
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 01:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 02:47 pm (UTC)Translation: I am so selfish, that I don't think any of your problems and time constrictions matter as much as me getting my fanfic out. How can you even think of putting stupid stuff like your career and health before me? I am a super precious snowflake person, everyone has to put me first"
Seriously someone really has been hit by the moron tower (moron tower is stolen from some of voracities epic xander centred fanfic)
Sorry you had to deal with such a speshul snowflake, sometimes I really can't believe people ...
Oh and hope you'll get well soon ... - virtually sending you some of the great white grapes from my garden for Vitamin C
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 04:15 pm (UTC)hope you get to feeling better soon!
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 02:53 pm (UTC)Beta work is hard, I've done it and it's time consuming... and I'm gonna suspect that the ungrateful person wouldn't even take any advice you'd offer anyway... which would make everything even more wretched.
Let us know where you want the naquadah bombs delivered and we'll do it for you.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 03:15 pm (UTC)I'm sorry you're still feeling lousy. Sending cyber hugs while wearing a surgical mask (now that's rotten, LOL).
Now I'm selfish
Date: 2011-10-25 03:37 pm (UTC)Anyway, I just saw the Zack'n'Chris show up there and had the following reactions:
1. OMG SHE'S ABOUT TO POST HAVOC
2. Great, Inner Slash Ho, how are you better than the Entitlement Princess?
3. What is with all the Pine stubble?
4. Wait, he shaves everything? (Yes, I read the Spanish subtitles) Every everything? Might he be first cousin to a Pewaris what-have-you, or am I doing naughty crossovers through the matter bridge in my brain again?
5. CRY HAVOC! There's a clean shaven Pine and Quinto and they look like the boys heading out to the after party of their Starfleet Academy graduation after the shower they had to take because they got their uniforms all messy in the supply closet before the shower. And stuff.
6. Did I ever tell Keira to feel better? Because this vid is making me feel better.
7. There is a very large supply of images of these boys being flirty, bumping shoulders and sharing loooooong looks, isn't there?
8. DATING? The woman asked if they were dating? Srsly?
9. Nine is a myth, like unicorns or the moon being made of green cheese.
10. You should probably shove lemon toddies through the modem at Keira for that cough.
FEEL BETTER, K!
Re: Now I'm selfish
Date: 2011-10-25 07:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 03:59 pm (UTC)The proper response to a negative answer to your question is "oh okay, Thank You." The Thank You implies that you are courteous enough to be grateful that you got any response at all and are aware that just because you asked doesn't mean the answer is yes. Or as my son's kindergarten teacher used to say "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit."
no subject
Date: 2011-10-25 04:36 pm (UTC)Also bitching at you probably wasn't such a good way to leave a bridge open for possibly asking you to beta in the future if/when you don't have so much going on.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-26 12:38 am (UTC)As a beta reader: No. Just no. I'm sorry, but you don't drop a story (I don't care if it's a 100 word drabble) on a beta reader with a request to beta read that story, when you haven't had a dialogue with said beta reader, and have been assured that the beta is 1) interested, 2) available, and 3) you both know what you're getting into and what's to be expected. Hell, the few people I always beta for always ask me if I have the time/am available to do it before they send anything my way. And they know I'm not gonna say no to them.
I'm sorry, but anyone who just drops something on me without my having beta read for them before, talked about what kind of story it is/what's in it/what pairing, etc., or even found out if I am available prior to shoving their fic off on me is going to get a big fat no. I don't care if it's a story I'd love to work with, or a person I like. No. Because you don't do that.
And you do not especially call a beta reader who says they can't (for whatever reason under the sun they don't want to/can't beta for you) "fucking selfish". Um, hello? Are you paying me to work for you? No. You wanna demand I look at your story? Start paying me $20 an hour, with a two-hour minimum, and then we'll talk.
TL;DR: Entitled douchebags are entitled.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-26 07:33 am (UTC)Do you really want to deal with a douchenozzle like that?
No.
Now the gracious writer? That might be someone you'd want to work with somewhere down the line.
Give of yourself as much as you feel comfortable with. When you feel stretched too far and overwhelmed then scale back a bit. No sense in making yourself sick or getting worse when you are sick.
Btw, I feel you on the pms thing. I had to reign in the urge to run over stupid fuckers at work with the walker stacker. Didnt' stop me from snarling at ppl though.
no subject
Date: 2011-11-09 07:50 am (UTC)In my mind, if someone writes, and takes that endevour even moderately seriously, then they're likely at least moderately intelligent.
But no... they have to fuck up that pretty little illusion by being "all about me" when it comes to interacting with other intelligent people. On second thoughts, I believe I'm just going to have to have a laugh about it. The irony is astounding, when you think about it.
Keira, I know that I had asked in the past for you to beta for me, then I had that massive computer situation. After I got it sorted out and was able to catch up on your posts here, I realized that you were simply too busy; frankly I had become busier by that point myself. So, being the polite gentleman I am, I decided to leave the matter as it was for now. A much more intelligent approach then seeking a response then berating the one I didn't want. Yeah, that was the sound of me laughing again. I'm sure you know the one.
Joke'em if they can't take a fuck. ;-)
no subject
Date: 2011-11-09 12:22 pm (UTC)