Too Young for a Red Hat
May. 20th, 2011 06:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
keiramarcosI started writing fan fiction to escape. It's true and even though it appears I don't have much to escape from -- everyone needs an escape, a safe place to let go of their individual burdens and not have to worry about anything but amusing themselves.
I'll be the first to admit that I take some things in my life for granted. Some things just come so damned easy to me that I've never stopped to consider how awesome those things are. Career wise I'm not super successful OR on the edge of failure. I'm in the middle ground--comfortable and even content most of the time. Do I wish for more? Sure, but it isn't a driving, unbearable ache in me. Being content in that particular area is pretty damned cool in retrospect.
I lie blatantly about my age on LJ, FB, and even my own site in some weird effort to hide who I really am. It probably isn't the only lie I tell to keep my identities online and in real life separate. Maybe, I don't even need to but I feel like I've dropped off into a black hole on this subject and if I confessed all now it would be a big huge deal where in the past it might not have even earned a mention. Because it boils down to this--I'm more popular (statistics wise) on the Internet as Keira than I probably ever will be under any other name or pen name I might chose. I'm not even sure why to be honest. I never tried to get a lot of hits on my site--not like I do for other sites that I have. Perhaps it's because as Keira there is a freedom in me that I have no where else in my life. I can say what I want and honestly not give a fuck what anyone thinks about it. "Keira Marcos" is isolated, in her own little world where there are absolutely no repercussions for what she thinks and says. She doesn't have to explain herself to anyone.
As to my real age, I'm too young for a Red Hat and too old for hip huggers. I'm just the right age for ridiculous shoes, a semi-serious purse fetish, and and recently some pretty college boy asked me if I was interested in being HIS cougar. LOL. I hope I didn't hurt his ego too bad when I laughed at him because he was adorable.
Edited to add: Okay, you know what? I lie to everyone I can about my age. The only people who get a real number are my doctors. Last weekend I lied to my hair dresser about my age while my mother was around and she just nodded her head and agreed because when I'm younger, so is she!
I'll be the first to admit that I take some things in my life for granted. Some things just come so damned easy to me that I've never stopped to consider how awesome those things are. Career wise I'm not super successful OR on the edge of failure. I'm in the middle ground--comfortable and even content most of the time. Do I wish for more? Sure, but it isn't a driving, unbearable ache in me. Being content in that particular area is pretty damned cool in retrospect.
I lie blatantly about my age on LJ, FB, and even my own site in some weird effort to hide who I really am. It probably isn't the only lie I tell to keep my identities online and in real life separate. Maybe, I don't even need to but I feel like I've dropped off into a black hole on this subject and if I confessed all now it would be a big huge deal where in the past it might not have even earned a mention. Because it boils down to this--I'm more popular (statistics wise) on the Internet as Keira than I probably ever will be under any other name or pen name I might chose. I'm not even sure why to be honest. I never tried to get a lot of hits on my site--not like I do for other sites that I have. Perhaps it's because as Keira there is a freedom in me that I have no where else in my life. I can say what I want and honestly not give a fuck what anyone thinks about it. "Keira Marcos" is isolated, in her own little world where there are absolutely no repercussions for what she thinks and says. She doesn't have to explain herself to anyone.
As to my real age, I'm too young for a Red Hat and too old for hip huggers. I'm just the right age for ridiculous shoes, a semi-serious purse fetish, and and recently some pretty college boy asked me if I was interested in being HIS cougar. LOL. I hope I didn't hurt his ego too bad when I laughed at him because he was adorable.
Edited to add: Okay, you know what? I lie to everyone I can about my age. The only people who get a real number are my doctors. Last weekend I lied to my hair dresser about my age while my mother was around and she just nodded her head and agreed because when I'm younger, so is she!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:27 pm (UTC)~L
Another inbetweener
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:31 pm (UTC)this made me LoL, 'cause the same thing happened to me last friday, and I consider it a good thing that rather than cry (as I did on my 30th b-day, 'cause I'm sad like that) I laughed and genuinely enjoyed the fact that the circumstance even occurred at all.
As to the rest, I admit that because I love your writing I would love to read pretty much anything you produce (still waiting for what I'm sure is a pretty awesome grocery list), I sometimes am curious as to your alter ego(s), but I genuinely respect you too much to even do a sly e-mail nudge about it (never mind the fact that you'd probably virtually bitch slap me for it, legitimately as you've made it pretty clear that "kiera" is separate, and I'm not stupid). So um... Yeah, what you're doing now? Is awesome and I'm totally ok with the crumbs you share. :-)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:34 pm (UTC)sigh.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:42 pm (UTC)Oh and almost completely unrelated, I now have friggin' Tom Jones 'Leave your hat on' and the end scene from The Full Monty on replay in my head, because for some reason all my brain is seeing is the word "hat" in your subject line, and that's where my brain goes.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:31 pm (UTC)will stop rambling now and wish you a good night
PS: no idea what a red hat is... so your age is still a mystery to me
no subject
Date: 2011-05-20 11:37 pm (UTC)http://www.redhatsociety.com/
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:11 am (UTC)But if here church is right I don't have worry about that since Saterday the world ends. Went to Easter service with her and got a world is endding service instead of a nice easter service.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:29 am (UTC)I want to buy a car just so I can have that as a bumper sticker.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 02:03 am (UTC)Thank you for making me laugh so hard I was in danger of inhaling my face.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 04:09 am (UTC)You totally rock.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 07:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:04 am (UTC)I suspect this all makes me very selfish but at my time of life? I don't give e flying fig. So you go girl!
BTW - your Red Hat comment made me giggle. Over here there is a saying. Red Hat, No Knickers. Kind of apt for slash writer/slash fan.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:09 am (UTC)I'm just old-fashioned enough to believe it's probably a good thing for most people to hide their identity on-line. There's a lot of bad stuff that can happen when people surrender their privacy.
Sorry to get so serious - I'm a little touchy about privacy after having to recite my SSN in the middle of a crowded hospital waiting room today.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 04:07 am (UTC)I have a long running love affair with C & H, and that icon is simply fabulous.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 10:50 am (UTC)I've tried to figure out where I snagged that icon, but have had no luck. I'm still a huge C&H fan.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 03:07 am (UTC)Actually just read a C&H/Inception fanfic this weekend. There needs to be more C&H fic :)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 07:36 pm (UTC)One is real name, one is a name I've used for years on the club scene, and my fanfic is all on here.
The main reasons this is separate is firstly many of my RL friends would be weirded out by me writing anything as explicit as some of my fic, and secondly it would not be good for work! This one is not linked to the others at all.
Although this identity is named after an old RPG character I had, and has one current RPG game character's story on it, so there are technically about 8-10 people who would probably guess it was me!
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 03:36 am (UTC)age is only a number...
Date: 2011-05-21 01:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:46 am (UTC)For all we know Mr. Marcos, cousin Stan, and the dog next door are all figments of your imagination. (Talk about a meta-story!) Who cares? You're obviously a talented writer who has created a community here. That doesn't change if you tell us you're 22 or 82.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 01:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 03:10 am (UTC)Mr. Marcos is definitely the Cock Provider. I can't be left attended in the world. It's like his job to make sure I don't blow anything up.
I do have a cousin/partner in crime but his name isn't Stan. I don't use any real names on my LJ.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 03:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 04:05 am (UTC)Age is only a number. And hey, 50 is the new 30.
My grandmother lied about her age her entire life. The only reason the rest of the family found out her real age is that someone knocked her purse off the table at a family BBQ and more than a year's worth of Social Security checks spilled out on the ground in front of us.
She was entirely incensed that the government had begun to send her Social Security checks after her 70th birthday, despite the fact that she had never filed for it. She still worked full time, still lived on her own, still dressed like something off the cover of Town & Country and was far too young to be getting retirement checks from some upstart government weasels.
Of course, everyone in the family had thought that she was in her early sixties. Even my mother had no idea that my grandmother was at least a decade older than anyone in the family knew.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 04:43 am (UTC)It isn't the name that has built the community, it's your talent and the parts of your personality you've chosen to show us. Personally I find your fierce honesty refreshing. Now, of course, I'll need to quantify 'honesty' to mean that when you write in LJ, a personality shines through that I find compelling, entertaining and extremely easy to like. You tell it like you see it, and I enjoy that.
heh... still not a stalker
I just enjoy reading how articulate you are in ways I've forgotten how to be.
If you're thinking of droping the 'personal fiction', that's something only you can decide. It has to be the right choice for you, for whatever reasons, and not out of a sense of obligation or guilt. With no other way to preserve our private lives, people who spend a good deal of time online are almost forced to be fiercely protective of their real selves and present only what they want others to see. I find absolutely no fault in that, and in fact encourage it. Remember the asshats? Yeah, still out there.
Seriously, I'm not one of them LOL
As for a Nomme du Plumme... I encourage that too. Fanfiction is indeed an escape, both for writers and readers. It isn't a source of income, so there's no need to stamp your true name all over it so you can pay your due share of taxes. Just like your characters, you can be whomever you want to be, however is most comfortable for you. It doesn't really matter, because what your readers are looking for is to be entertained. That's it. Providing entertainment allows them to enjoy their own escape. I don't believe there's a right or wrong in it. It just has to work for you.
So... Wear your crown happily and be easy, Queen of Bitchocity. I don't see a need to abdicate. heh Long live the Queen!
P.S. Practice the royal wave
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 07:53 am (UTC)No matter what my age, weight or current health the picture of me that lives in my head as me is much younger, thinner and mostly a touch saner version of around 30 which is when I final got who I am.
End of the world sticker?
Wow! What a ride!!!!!!!!!!!
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 12:19 pm (UTC)I don't lie about my age. I look a lot younger than I am so I could probably get away with it, but being 50 works. It gives you license to say pretty much what you want about everything! Which is a lot some days.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 02:11 pm (UTC)I grew up that age is all but a number, one of my nans is over 80 and she works as a dog walker, has holidays to everywhere and always has a pint of Guinness and a cigar on a Sunday afternoon.
I'm old enough to have a university degree but not to drink in most American States, alas I do tell people my age when I'm out drinking as everyone thinks my older sister by 6 years is younger then me, I don't know wither to be happy that I'm seen as more mature then my sister or annoyed because even my own mother gets confused.
-from sunny (for once) ole' England
no subject
Date: 2011-05-21 06:45 pm (UTC)PS: I love escaping into your fanfiction worlds. It gives me a place to retreat to, real life just sucks!
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 04:40 pm (UTC)I don't lie anout my age (three months short of 59) because people tend to think I look younger, I'd rather they do that than think eewww she looks so much older.
Fanfic is my way of coping with all the shit life throws at me. It helps me cope with the actual physical pain as well. Don't know how it works but it does, as I need to minimize the use of pain killers.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 05:54 pm (UTC)it matters not to your fans how old you are, we just adore your talent as a writer of exceptional fiction.
p,s.sorry to have been absent for a while, real life and arthritis in hands stopping computer participation